It’s after 2am on 27th December, Iv never been so Emotionally & Physically tired before. It’s been a very stressful week.
Christmas time is so stressful & not a pleasant time for me as I’m sure it’s not for you either. I don’t think iv enjoyed it since before I hit my teens.
All that running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off. Dealing with people who are themselves stressed. Then they take it out on perfect strangers. It’s just a horrid time of year. And all for just one day!
Then there is the hard task of putting on our ‘masks’ & pretending that everything is okay, that’s a draining thing to have to do all the time. Yes I’d love to say “No I’m not good at all. I’m struggling so badly at the moment. To be honest I just want to crawl into a ball & sleep this time away.” But I don’t I just smile & say “I’m great thank you, how are you?”
These are my family members who I see once or twice a year but know nothing about what’s going on in my life & probably don’t really care either. So having to make small talk can really take it out of you when you’re having to do it all day.
After pretending everything is fine for the last few days & the constant stress of making it a lovely time for others, I am absolutely exhausted & desperate for sleep.
Unfortunately that isn’t happening. I’m trying but I think I’m over tired & very stressed. I wish I had some sleeping tablets to knock myself out for a few days as I think that’s exactly that my poor body & mind needs. But as luck would have it I don’t have any sleeping tablets so it’s going to be another horrible few hours before I finally get the sleep I so desperately need.
On the plus side Christmas is over for another year & that in itself makes me very happy.
I hope you had a good time & you’re not feeling like me!
I should take my own advice & be kind to myself.